Welcome And The Core Quote

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Yo, yo, yo, welcome back to the Fither Your Lifestyle Podcast Conversations on Lifestyle, Passions, and Hustles. My name's Chris. I am your host, and I'm super excited to be back here having the conversation with you. Episode 266 today, and we're talking about a quote that I actually heard off the TV show Shrinking, which is has been a really, really good show. It's really deep, and there's a lot of confrontation in that in that TV show. But the quote is if you're not growing, you're not living. And I think when we think about some of the biggest signs that you're truly alive, there's a lot of things that people probably think about or we probably relate to or maybe assume when really maybe it isn't necessarily always that happiness. Maybe it isn't always about success. Maybe it isn't always about achievement. But what if it's actually growth? Now I think growth leads to happiness, leads to success, and leads to achievement. Because when I look back in some of the most meaningful seasons of my life, though they they weren't always the easiest, they weren't always the most successful moments, but there were periods in which I was growing. And then the outcome resulted in success or an outcome of maybe something that was tangible, of maybe you were rewarded with a promotion or something. But and they weren't even easy times, but afterwards you felt absolutely 100% accomplished because you came out as a better version of yourself. That's what I want to talk to talk to you to. That's what I want to talk to you about today. Because at the end of the day, life and growth are inseparable, right? If as the code says, if you're not growing, you're not living. Not because growth is required, I think it's more so because growth is naturally it's what happens when you engage with life. You learn, you adapt, you evolve, and you become, hopefully, a better version of yourself. So if that sounds like something that you want to have a conversation about today, we're going to dive into that. If you do enjoy these episodes, please jump down below, hit subscribe. Otherwise, you can share the episode, you can leave a comment, anything you can do to help build this podcast out a little bit further as I'm helping you further your lifestyle. Hopefully, you can help us grow that networking community, and we can help other people further their lifestyle as well. Let's roll the intro and let's get into it.

Redefining Growth Beyond More

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So I think growth doesn't necessarily have to mean bigger, right? And I think that's probably the first myth or misconception. We need to make sure people understand that. It isn't all about more money, it isn't all about more followers, it isn't about more success, it isn't about more achievement. Growth, I think, my personal opinion, is about becoming calmer, becoming kinder, becoming how to learn to have more patience, how to set boundaries, how to heal better, how to just be a better version of yourself. It's not necessarily about expansion, though that's typically the way we tend to always go about it, especially for men. We're very hunter-gatherer type fellas. And I think taking a step back and actually looking at the things that enable us to become better people, better individuals, it's not about the money. It's not about the followers, it's not about the success. It's actually about how we manage ourselves, how we manage our lives, how we manage the things around us. Being calmer, being kinder, being patient, setting up the boundaries, having those healthy relationships and that balance within being able to do things and your responsibilities and your accountabilities, et cetera, et cetera. So sometimes it is that refinement. Life is going to constantly continue to ask more of you, not just the cost of living. I mean, that's that's a that has just been an absolute roller coaster in the last few years here, especially here in Australia. But every season demands something new. It requires something more of you. And the version of you that was perfect for school or your 20s or your first job or your first relationship, it may not be the same version of you required now. Life will keep asking you, who do you need to become next? What do you need to be able to be equipped to be able to do what is next? Now, a lot of the time we we don't know what we need until we get to the end and we realize, ah, this was great. But that's that growth challenge, that's that growth moment, that's the climbing of the hill, that's the hiking of the mountain. You're doing it and you think, this is tough, this is hard, why am I doing this? Really questioning your life choices. But you get to the end and the outcome is wow, and you look down and you see how far you've come and you get to soak in the view. All of that is exactly the same metaphor or parallel of what we're trying to talk about here. Is by the time you get to the top of the mountain, you are a different person because you feel like you've conquered it, you you feel successful, but you can see how important it was to do that, to do that height, to do that journey.

How Stagnation Sneaks In

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Now, stagnation, stagnation is another thing that we need to kind of make sure we just kind of give a little kick to the side because it does feel self-it does feel safe, but it's not really going to be the best thing for you. And the reason why is because I think most most people don't really choose stagnation. I don't want to do anything, but it kind of happens slowly through our just habitual ways of living. You stop learning, or you stop challenging yourself, or you stop trying new things, or you stop running, or you stop exercising, or you stop taking risks, or you stop risking failure. Eventually, life becomes predictable. It becomes just a routine, it becomes just the same old drag, and then it becomes comfortable, then it becomes frustrating, and then it becomes empty. We want to avoid that, right? So usually a lot of the time, you know the things that are going to get you out of your comfort zone because you can feel it. You can feel it chips away, you can feel it, oh, it's gonna make me uncomfortable. It means I'm gonna have to do more, it means I'm gonna have to do something I don't want to do, it means I'm gonna have to talk to someone, it means I'm gonna have to get uncomfortable. That is growth. That's your brain, yes, trying to be defensive and say, hey, hey, hey, hey, what are you doing? What are you doing? Trying to put in survival stint of I don't want to have to do this because it means you're gonna have to go through the process of it.

Attention Spans And Taking Ownership

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But I I think even more in this day and age, 2026, with all the things that we deal with, with the short attention spans, with the challenge of attention grabbing, we tend to just switch off quicker and not want to deal with it because we just take in so much more. And I think our brains have been rewired a little bit to really suffer from that. So we need to make sure we can take ownership of realizing that, okay, hang on, I'm not growing. And that's why for me, I actually struggle to sit still. I struggle to just take a day off and play video games because I feel like I'm not moving towards where I want to be. And that's what we talk about here on the podcast, right? I'm doing one thing every day that's gonna get you closer to where you want to be. And it's not about being the best, the biggest, and the greatest. It's about being the best, the biggest, the greatest version of you, but not compared to anyone else. So you really need to make sure you need to keep yourself accountable and responsible for that because no one else is gonna do it. We spoke about that a few weeks back, right? No one else is coming to save you. You need to take responsibility. And

Growth Feels Like Letting Go

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and growth will often feel like sometimes it might feel like a bit of a loss. This is where it gets kind of like a bit of an interesting puzzle because, as I was saying, it's it's not always exciting. It's gonna make you uncomfortable. It means sometimes you have to let go. Might mean you're leaving people behind, might mean mean you're changing your mind, you're going a different direction, you're letting go of old goals that you thought is what you wanted. When I was working the nine to five corporate job in consulting, I thought I was gonna be a lifer there. I did less than 10 years and I stepped away and I knew and there was that inkling of I wanted my own thing. I wanted my own business, I wanted to have my own podcast, I wanted to do all these things, but if I was gonna focus on that, these things would never happen. So I had to choose the hard path. And it's the best thing that I ever did because it's given me the growth that I never imagined I would have at work. I assumed I would, but I never would have got it. And it's given me happiness and a whole new opportunity of world in which I can create whatever I want. And I think yeah, so growth will sometimes mean you become unfamiliar with who you thought you were going to be. And every level of growth requires the death of the old version of yourself. It's it's it's a hard thing to swallow, but that's the reality of it. And you think, why would anyone want that? But that's the thing. You get to the outcome and you realize this is the best thing. So you need to have that small inkling of, I want to be going for a run, or I would love to be able to do that, or I would love to be cool to live over here sometime, or I'd love to get my first investment property, all these different things. But they seem out of reach. But the reality is the daily progress, the daily movement, and daily moving towards where you're trying to be and challenges going through the challenges, going through the things that will make you uncomfortable, makes it attainable over a long period of time. It's not about necessarily you've got to do this tomorrow, because some things will take time. That that's the reality of it. But if you ain't doing anything, you ain't gonna get anything either.

Living Fully Creates Growth

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So I don't think the goal should be growth. I I know here we are talking about growth, but it's a bit of a twist, right? The goal, I think, is you want to be living fully, you want to be participating deeply, you want to be staying curious, you want to be remaining, I guess, engaged. And growth is simply what happens as a result of that. That's what we call growth. You've learned how to live better, you've learned how to participate more, you've learned how to be more curious, you've learned how to remain engaged with the things that are actually getting you the experience, right? So it's like breathing, it's like seasons changing and it's like trees growing, right? The growth is the result, but they've had to go through the challenges, they've had to go through the the hard things in order to get that growth. And we're talking physical in this sense, but as a as a metaphor for ourselves, that's exactly what it is.

Questions To Check Your Growth

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So a question for you is what are you what are you growing right now? And this is where I challenge you, right? It's not about what are you achieving, it's more about what are you growing? Are you working on your confidence, discipline, courage, patience, self-trust, relationships, your health, your mental health? Because if something is growing, you're alive in that area. But if there's neglection in others, it means it's getting thrown under the rug. And that's the things we want to avoid. So, a couple of little questions before we close for you is where in your life have you stopped growing? You you can answer this for yourself. What challenge keeps presenting itself that you're avoiding? They're the ones we know we should probably be taking. And what is life trying to teach you right now? Listening to this, what what do you think it's actually telling you? And what version of yourself are you slowly becoming, or would you like to be becoming? So I I think to finish it up, maybe living isn't measured by how comfortable you become, right? It's it's measured by how willing you are to keep evolving, keep becoming a better version of yourself, to keep learning, to keep stretching, to keep becoming. Because when you're growing, you're participating in life. And maybe that's what living really is.

Next Week Teaser And Wrap

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Now we're going to be doing an episode next week talking about how happiness will beat vanity every day of the week. And it's a really important episode for me. If that sounds like something you're interested, make sure you jump back next week. Make sure you hit subscribe so you do get the notification. We'll have episodes coming out every week after this anyway. So if you do enjoy these, please leave a comment, say hi, introduce yourself, let me know what you're doing, how you're doing. Did you enjoy the episode? If you want to continue the conversation, more than happy to do so. Otherwise, share it with someone that maybe needs to just hear this about growth. I appreciate you being here. You have a wonderful day, wherever you are, whatever you're doing, and I'll see you when I'm looking at you. Ciao.