Welcome And The Big Idea

Yo, yo, yo, welcome back to the Feather Your Lifestyle Podcast Conversations on Lifestyle Passions and Hustles. My name's Chris. I'm your host, and I'm super excited to be back here having the conversation with you. Episode 263 today. And look, this this one this one's for the dreamers, it's for the builders, it's for the ones that are trying something different, it's for the ones that, you know, see something that maybe others don't see. But it's also for the doubters, it's also for the backseat drivers, it's also for the people that have that have something to say, but rarely have anything on the line. Now, if you're trying to build anything meaningful, at some point you are going to have people who come into your life and can only see life through their, I guess, size of their imagination. And this is something that I've I've had huge challenges with, other people's limits becoming my problem. And not everyone is going to understand your vision. And the people, you know, the people who doubt you are usually tallying on themselves, right? They're usually frustrated at themselves, so they take it out on you. And what we need to do is we need to stop borrowing other people's fear. This is the whole conversation for today. And we're gonna roll the intro in a moment. But the core the core idea of all of this is a lot of the criticism that will come through to you in all that you do, whether it's at work, whether it's on a YouTube, whether it's on a podcast, or just going about trying to build a business or anything like that, a lot of the time and majority of the time, it isn't actually about you. It's actually about what your courage exposes to these individuals. When someone sees you taking risks, speaking up, creating, leading, backing yourself, or thinking different, it can trigger something in their heads. Not inspiration, but sometimes, majority of the time, it's insecurities. They're hurt. And a great little quote from Pat Flynn is hurt people, hurt people. That's what we're talking about today. We're gonna roll the intro and let's get into it.

Why Criticism Often Isn’t About You

Now, if you do enjoy these episodes, please, please, it would be really great if you can jump down below, hit hit subscribe, leave a comment, continue the conversation, and you could share it, right? Share it to someone that maybe needs to hear this. So the first area that I want to talk about today is people can only see through their own lens. And we have covered this conversation numerous times, but if someone has never built something on their own, risked something or put it on the line, failed publicly, or started from zero, how can they fully understand what it is that you're doing? The people that are commenting on me, I've had literally both from other runners, which is absolutely so unprofessional, but I've had people saying, Oh, aren't I a bit too fat to be running? And I look at them and I'm like, yeah, because you're some expert, aren't you? And that stuff cracks me up. Absolutely cracks me up. And a lot of these people sit behind a screen and I don't know who they are, and it makes them feel big and strong. I don't know why it does, but because they can bring me down because maybe they're not doing anything with their lives in the first place. But how can they fully understand what it is that you're doing when they're not even doing it themselves? They can't, right? It's that simple. So what do they do? They they judge you, they bring you down, they criticize you, and they do that through a lens that makes them feel safe in this small little box, just because that's all they can see, that's all they can believe, that's all they can understand. People don't always see your vision, they only see their limitations. And I've been through this experience personally in terms of I don't know what I don't know, right? When people have, I'm always happy to be proven wrong. I'm happy to learn. That's how I've gone to where I am today. Now, I could say that I'm successful, and people say, you're not successful, you haven't done this. And it's well, who's defining success? You define your own success, right? If I say I want to go run a marathon, I remember when I ran my first marathon and they did four hours and I think it was 44 minutes, and someone told me, mate, that's not running. You should be getting sub four. Jeez, didn't realize there was such a rut police. And there's been a lot of criticism of people if you walk during your marathon, that no, no, it didn't count because there's these people that are able to re able to run the entire thing. That is a big feat, and kudos to the people that can do it. But mate, if you're getting out there, you're giving it your best shot, and it means you've got to slow down to be able to complete the task. You do what you gotta do, stuff everyone else. It's like that in life. Just because you didn't get the promotion doesn't mean you're not good enough. It just means there might have only been one slot and someone else got it, and you'll get a promotion another time, right? Or you can move to another business and you'll be promoted there. It's it does not define your life, right? But for some people, when they see these opportunities to that make them feel insecure, they have to come out and make themselves feel better about it by bringing you down. And often you'll find that the loudest critics have actually the least at risk. These people don't have skin in the game. These people, the the ones with the strongest opinions, the ones with, I guess, the sharpest comments or the best advice. I love it when people come and say, hey, Chris, my advice is you need to do this. It's like, who the heck are you? I don't know who you are. It's like, where have I got mentors and people that are ahead of me and people that I look up to and admire and respect, and they say, hey, Chris, if I was in this situation, this is what I would do. And you can understand it a bit better. Now, I'm not to say that some of these people, maybe they are experts, maybe they do have all experience and maybe I should be listening to them. But for when people come and give unsolicited advice with no understanding of who you are, I don't have never had a conversation with you. How is that respect there? Right? I can't just irrespect everyone just because someone says they are they're the best in the world. No, show it to me. Help me understand why I should listen to you. And it's just like me here. I'm sharing this, but you know, I've been showing up for the last 263 episodes. I've been showing up for the last five, six years documenting my journey. I only know to that point. But when people tell me it's oh, you need to do better, it's well, that that's what I strive to do every single day is to do better. And I can prove that because when we first started, this is what we were doing and this is where we are now. And that progress continues to grow. Got a bit off a tangent there. But a lot of the time these guys don't have anything on the line. They've got no skin in the game, they've done no reps, they've got no scars, they've got no experience, and it's easy to drive from the backseat, right? And the people in the backseat,

People Only See Through Their Lens

they're not even going to a destination. They're just like they're not driving to a destination, they're just there along for the ride, they're not doing anything, right? So, you know, we need we need to take a lot of this with a grain of salt. Some people need you to stay small in order for them to feel big. Not because they hate you, not because you're bad, but because your growth makes them question their own comfort. Your action is going to expose their hesitation. Your discipline is going to expose their excuses, and your courage exposes their fear. And that makes people very, very, very uncomfortable. And they don't like it, right? So your growth can unintentionally, as a byproduct, offend people who choose comfort. That's not my that's not my problem. That's not my fault. The amount of people that have seen what I've done and said, oh, I wouldn't be doing that because it's too risky. It's like you need to do this. It's like, I don't need to do anything you say. Sure, I need to be conservative, I need to be calculated, I need to understand the consequences and being willing to see it through, but I know I can back myself when I go do something. I'm not here to give people advice on how you should run your business or if you want to do this. What I do tell people to do is be consistent, do something good, be kind, and create something that gives people value, right? And when you do those things, things come together. Now that's very stripped back and very high level, but in reality, that's that's what it is. Jeez, I'm feeling really rammed up in this one. And I think it's important because it's a really tough conversation we need to have with ourselves for those that are dealing with the critics. And we'll probably have trolls come through on this one. So I'm just calling it out as it is. There's also this lack of imagination that creates false limitations. So some people genuinely can't see what's possible. Not because they're bad people or because they're not good people or anything like that. It's because what they've seen, what they've experienced, and where they are in their world is they've maybe played it safe, or they haven't had the chance to fail, or they don't try to stand out, or they don't risk too much. And look, that we're all different. I would encourage people to stretch their comfort zone as much as possible. That's what we talk about here. Further your lifestyle. So when you or me, we're thinking bigger and we're trying to do things which are uncomfortable, they think that's unrealistic, that's impossible, that's too risky. Who do you think you are? But just because they can't say it doesn't mean it isn't real. I've spoken about this so many times. When I started my business and I pivoted to clothing and I moved to majority clothing, like 80, 90% of our business, I literally had people, people that were ahead of me, come and say we said, You can't do this. It's just not feasible, it's not possible, right? No one is doing this in Australia. Since then, there's been heaps of people that have done that better than me, but we make it work, right? And just because it's like with washing all the clothing, people say, no, no, you shouldn't waste your money on doing that. Well, I need to do that. That's part of the process, that's the requirement. Just because you haven't been able to do it doesn't mean I'm not gonna be able to figure out how to do it when it comes to getting more stock. It's it's problem solving, right? And

Backseat Drivers And No Skin

a lot of time, people, if they can't solve the problem or they can't see the opportunity, or they can't see how we can get through the challenges, they think that's too hard. It's impossible, it's unrealistic. Therefore, if someone else comes and says, Oh, I'm gonna do this, they think, no way. My first year when I started business, I said I'm gonna do $100,000. And people called it out. It's like you won't be able to do it, it's impossible. And I didn't. I didn't. I got $56,000, right? The next year I only did $86,000. But the year after that, I did $126. And the year after that, I did over $250,000 the year after that I did over 370. And this year we're close to hitting $500,000, right? And that's the ability, when you round that out, if I've been, this is our sixth year, we've done five years worth of business, we're almost averaging $100,000 a year, right? If if we do the average. But we've done that in a single year, right? So the compounding effect, when you put in the action, put in the work, do what you think you're capable of, and more, you will see results which will flourish. And these people soon shut up. These people will soon disappear, they'll come back, stir up the pot a bit. But again, a lot of the time, you want to put your action and put your money where your mouth is, right? If you're saying you're gonna go do something, go do it. For those that are backseat driving, what are they doing? They got they're not proving anything, they're just there for for whatever reason to make themselves feel good and bring other people down, right? Now, for those people that are out here bringing other people down, get some help. If you want to chat, let's chat. All right, so oh yeah, what I was meant to say. People project their limits as if they're facts, and that's because they that's what they see as truth. To them, that is a fact. That because this is the world when really the world's this, this is what they're gonna say. Now, what we need to do, and this is where I have struggled the most, it is very hard. Uh, we're the first to say it, is we shouldn't fight them. The goal is to outlast them. And you don't need to argue, you don't need to defend, you don't need to explain yourself, even though I do because I get frustrated by it. But what we need to do is keep putting in the reps, keep showing up with consistency, show it up over time and show it up with with proof. And that's what I'm doing anyway. But results will always speak louder. They can be quiet because you've got to go do the work, but they're going to echo so much more in the long term in terms of a legacy and in terms of just volume. And that's why a lot of time when we when you see someone come out of nowhere and all of a sudden just blow up, they think, Oh, how did you do it? And it looks makes them look like they've been an overnight success. But usually it's a lot of reps. Here's me, this podcast. I'm showing up daily, I mean, showing up weekly, putting out the content, putting in the reps. We haven't blown up, we're not massive, but one day we will be. And when that happens, people are like, oh, how did you do it? It's well, just kept consistency, right? And of course, we've

Limits Disguised As “Facts”

got to fine-tune that, we have to grow from that, we have to take the lessons from that, we have to figure out how to make it bigger and better and value adding and etc. etc. But the point is, it it doesn't happen overnight, right? So it's about outlasting them and continuing to show up. So yeah, I've said this before. Your courage to be able to do this is gonna make a lot of people feel very, very uncomfortable. So, one more thing that I'll say is we don't want to become bitter about all of this. We want to become better. And this is why it's super important because sometimes there can be a bit of a blurry line. We don't want the doubters to make you feel angry, reactive, and defensive. It's definitely something always working on because the more successful I become, the more doubters come. That's just the reality with it. But we want to make them help us become sharper, clearer, and more focused. And I do. I get motivated by the people that try and bring me down. And not everyone who doubts you is your enemy. They're not they're not there to try and make your life miserable. Sometimes people are just trying to call out things and help people and give give obvious advice. I mean, again, if someone gives unsolicited advice and you have no idea who where they are, you have no idea of the intention, you have no idea where that is coming from. And if someone tells me no, you can't do it, right? If you've literally spent the last 20 years doing this and you haven't been successful, I'm gonna really listen to this conversation and I said, okay, well, well, what what happened? Whereas if someone literally been doing this for six months and they haven't been able to do it and they say, nah, nah, it's impossible. It's like, well, mate, I've been doing it for six years and it is working. So we really gotta be careful of who we listen to and how we listen to it and the questions we then ask from that. What I'm trying to say is that not everyone who doubts you is your enemy, but not everyone deserves access to your energy as well. So a couple of questions that you can reflect on. One, whose opinion am I giving too much weight to? Two, who in my life keeps projecting their limits onto me? Three, am I shrinking to make others feel comfortable? And four, what would I do if I stopped needing people to understand? So, to the doubters, thank you, to the backseat drivers, thank you, and to the people who couldn't who couldn't see it and haven't seen it and still don't see it, thank you. Because sometimes

Outlast Them With Consistent Reps

I think the greatest feel for my motivation has come from being underestimated. And I've got big goals, I've got big dreams. I remember when I called out that I wanted to make my business one day, I would love it to be a household name. Imagine people talking about your brand as if it's like Amazon, right? Or something like that. I'm not saying I want to be Amazon. What I'm saying is that you say Amazon and people know it, it's a household name. And I remember someone says, you will never be able to do that. It's okay, buddy, great. Imagine if the people that said that to Jeff Bezos back in the day, and man, they would be, they would be crying now, and they should have listened to it. And Jeff, I've listened to Jeff Bezos's, he used to send out a cordillary report, and just listening to his way and focus and approach, a lot of people think he wasn't going to be able to make it work. Look at him now, right? And that business continues to thrive. Anyway, my point is a lot of this does fuel me. It makes me so frustrated as well, which I'm still dealing with. That's why we're talking about it. But so the so if you're listening right now, stop borrowing other people's fear and start backing it with your own vision. And if this is something that you struggle with, I do. Leave a comment down below. Let's chat about it. How do we work through this together? How do we build each other up? How do we provide a positive space to be able to sharpen iron with iron and help each other thrive doing our dreams? And it doesn't even have to be business, it doesn't have to be a podcast or YouTube. You might be just going after a different dream, building a product or building a brand or whatever

Reflection Questions And Final Challenge

it is. I I want to I want to connect with you. I want to have a conversation with you. I think it's really important. That's it for me, folks. If you, as I said, if you want to continue, jump down below, reach out to me on the Instagrams. You can also see me on my personal. But yeah, appreciate you. Feel free to ask a question and just remember, you you've got this. Stuff everyone else. You've got this. I'm here to support you, I'm here to cheerlead or cheer support, and I love seeing others go after it, whatever it is that they want to do. I want to inspire, I want to aspire others to go further and or inspire other people to aspire further. And that that's the whole motto of what we're trying to achieve here. So if you need a little bit of a little bit of love, a little bit of support, jump down. I'm happy to give it. More than happy to help and support and be that encouragement where I can give it. I mean, I'm not gonna necessarily tell you how to do it, but hey, always happy to if I can help, I will help. Alright, team, that's it from me. I will see you next week and we'll do it all again.