EP. 147 - Will you do it or not? Yes or No? | Further Your Lifestyle Podcast

Speaker 1: 0:00

Yo yo yo. Welcome back to the Furrier Lifestyle podcast conversations on lifestyle passions and hustles. My name's Chris, I am your host and I'm super excited to be back here having the conversation with you Episode 147 today and we're going to get straight into it. And the topic of today is are you going to do this, yes or no? And the whole premise of this actually comes from the Diary of a CEO book and it's about this question that if we ask ourselves why we're doing something will I do this or not it may just be the single reason why we do or don't make effort or progress. For instance, while I go out for a run, if I see a hill, I can ask myself tangibly, like explicitly ask myself will you run up this hill? Will I run up this hill? And if I say yes, all of a sudden there's this additional emphasis on making it happen. But if I don't say anything, it defaults to a no. Therefore, you walk up the hill, and that's what we're talking about today, and I guess it's kind of like a to do or not to do, the dilemma of progress, because progress is tough, it's hard, it's a lot of work. We have to find ways to make it easy, but if you want to get up the hill, you ever have to walk it or run it, and, depending if you're out for a run or out for a walk, it changes the way that you feel about the run. Now, I'm not here to say that you have to do this in order to get that, or if you're not doing it this way, you're not doing it right. That's not the point of this conversation.

Speaker 1: 1:31

What the point of this conversation is, I guess, is exactly what I said at the start of this. Have you ever stood at the foot of a merifotical hill wondering if you should climb it? And that is really what we're exploring today. That is really what I want to make sure that we're questioning and challenging ourselves, because sometimes it's this very question that might actually be holding us back from getting to the other side. It's like when you see that statement around, the grass isn't always greener on the other side. However, let's say the grass is greener on the other side. Are you willing to jump the fence? Now, I'm not saying we should be doing anything illegal here and trespassing or anything like that, but sometimes there are barriers in front of us which require us to have to do things that maybe we don't want to do or we think we shouldn't do, or people have told us we can't do it this way, or it's just going to be an obstacle and we have to climb over a hill, or we have to climb over an obstacle. Yet once we get over there, we realize ha, it wasn't actually that bad. That's what we're talking about today. So let's get into it, get cozy and let's roll the intro.

Speaker 1: 2:45

So, when it comes to doing this kind of thing, I think it starts off with the power of actual decision making. Now, when we think about the importance of decision making in personal growth, we get to dictate our own terms, even though it's a very airy fairy conversation. If we actually jump back to episode 146, I was talking about how I made decisions to let go of things in terms of meaning. I gave up on things because I felt like I was a failure, because people were bringing me down, but, at the end of the day, we need to make decisions that are best for us in terms of growing, but not the best of us, because we want to shelter and protect ourselves, because we're scared of what others would think. However, on the contrary as well, when we meet forks or crossroads or we have decision points in front of us, by delaying making a decision, making an indecision, can actually be a decision to not move forward because there's actually only one way To do something is to say I'm gonna do it. Otherwise, if you avoid making decision to do it, you're still making the decision not to do it because you're delaying in, not in doing it. But if we tangibly and consciously actually say no, I don't want to do this, I think that actually works better than not making a decision Because you're not dealing with whatever the issue is. That's making you not want to proceed or to present, and I think I think that's really what we need to think about is like when we have Questions in life and it could be as simple as you know should I run up this hill or am I gonna run up this hill? It can start to set the stage for changing, for changing the journey that we have ahead of us. And it's in these little things. It's kind of like atomic habits. It starts with the little triggers. It starts with the little things that enabled the big, big ripple effects, or it's almost gonna come sweeping through Like a snowball as we start to build momentum as we start to make these decisions, as we start to change the way we operate and how we think, we can start to see snowball effects.

Speaker 1: 4:46

And it really comes down to, I guess, this other part of conversation, which is the psychology of how many times have you found yourself questioning yourself in the sense of am I good enough for this? I'm so stupid, I shouldn't have done this, what were you thinking? All these little thoughts in our heads when we have this self doubt conversation, all this fear of failure of conversation with ourselves, it influences our decisions and it kind of almost, it almost creates this bias. It's confirmation bias, because we're saying all these things and we, we basically then continue to tell ourselves that we're not good enough. So therefore, why would we have a big enough? So then we, when we see those things, we think no, no, no, that's not for me Right, because of the fear of failure or because of the self doubt, or because of all these things Telling us why we can't. But when was the last time, when those things arise, that you actually said will I do this?

Speaker 1: 5:37

It doesn't matter whether you think you can't say will you do it, and I think that's really what we have to unpack is what goes into our minds when we're in the cusp of making a decision, and it seems to be like this tug of war between will I or won't I, will I or won't I, or it's this natural state of like I can't do that, not even asking ourselves Will I do this, will I attempt this? And it's not even. Will I not do this? It's actually like I can't do this. That's our default right Now.

Speaker 1: 6:05

There's obviously times where people might say, oh, who wants to do this? Or I need a volunteer, or someone asked for help, or there's something that arises and you know I can do that because you do it all the time. That's great and it's because you're comfortable doing it. But I'm talking about the stuff that you're not comfortable doing, all that you have an exposure or that you have aspirations for, but you don't realize that it's going to require you To run up a hill. So Running up a hill, it really does illustrate all these different challenges that we have in your life, because all of the time they're small things that we have to do. Right, we all have personal hills. It might be having a tough conversation with someone. It might have mean having to change the way we eat. It might mean Having to do something, what we haven't done before. It might even be asking for a discount when you go for a coffee. It might even be helping someone or offering to help. It could be having to try to do something a different way because the last five ways hasn't worked.

Speaker 1: 7:02

The reality is, every hill that we encounter is unique and it's then comes down to how do we recognize our hills and must the courage to actually Run up them. Now, I know I'm talking somewhat it sounds like riddles because I'm talking about hills, but the reality is, you know the things that you avoid. You know the things that give you the opportunity to make a decision like let's do this, that you continue to, like, you know, avoid or decide not to. And I think it really comes down to the conversation around turning will I into I will, and that it's that. It's that mentality and psychology around it of how do we transform that hesitation into actual action and actually take action.

Speaker 1: 7:43

And I think it comes down to a few different things as this role of motivation, goal setting and mindset. You know, when we go to do things, there's a level of we're doing it because we're motivated. We're doing it because there's something that we're trying to escape or there's something that we're trying to get closer to push or pull Right. You know, I'm building this business because I wanted to get out of the nine to five, but it wasn't that I wanted to get out. I got out and I don't want to go back and I wanted to create something that is mine and it's not about the money.

Speaker 1: 8:13

The motivation to do it daily is to see the progress and to see that one day, maybe, just maybe, I'll be doing 10x what I was doing while working for someone else. But to get there, from this motivation, I said goals, I said things to keep me on track, to challenge me, to test me. But then there's the mindset level of it. How do you manage that when things aren't going to play, like this week, the actual time of me filming this week? It's probably been one of my worst weeks in months, in in almost a year, and it's it's weird because, like, I've been pushing hard.

Speaker 1: 8:46

Yes, I've come back from being on a break, but it plays with your mindset. Does that mean we give up or will I continue to go forward? Or I will continue to move forward. And I will get past this to say with running we're motivated for different reasons. To run might be to lose weight, it might be to grow ourselves, it might be to challenge ourselves or to see what we're actually capable of. So then we set goals. Or I set goals, I'm going to run a half marathon every month. Or I'm going to go do a sign up and do a 50 K ultra marathon and building the mindset of resilience, of being able to get over the challenges of some about well, I do this, but I will do this.

Speaker 1: 9:21

And when we start to declare and make those transitions of indecision and actually being determined that is the key here and when we shift from asking will I go over there and actually start declaring that I will go over there and do this and have that conversation, the mentality and the psychology of the whole thing changes. So what is the whole, the whole conclusion of all this? What is, what is my point here? If you've missed out from because I've been going around in circles? It really comes down to we need to reflect on our own hills in life, the things that we know we don't like to necessarily embrace, but we know that if we did, they're actually going to make our lives that little bit better. So how do we go about approaching these with a new perspective? That's what we've been talking about today and, as we conclude, a bit of a shorter episode today.

Speaker 1: 10:11

But as we conclude, think about the hills you're facing, the challenges, and these are all metaphors. I don't know what your problems are. If you wanna share them, you can. You can talk about the things that you're going to get over, but when you think about your hills that you're facing, remember the decision to climb is the first step of actually reaching the summit. You can't reach the summit if you say, oh, one day I wanna climb a mountain, but it's actually like, okay, let's go to the mountain and let's start climbing it, and if you only get halfway, well, you've done more than you've ever done in your life. Next time you come back, you keep walking, you keep pushing through, but the challenge is actually admitting and accepting that I'm going to do this, that I will do this. So my call to action to you is, as I said, if there's something here that you've been challenged by or you think that you need to declare that you will do, let me know in the comments below. If you're here watching on the YouTube, check the comment down below. If you're here listening, you can reach out to me or you can jump up to the YouTube and leave a comment.

Speaker 1: 11:08

But I invite you to share your experience. I invite you to let me know. You can send me an email, you can reach out to me on the socials, but I wanna hear what you're doing. I wanna motivate you, I wanna encourage you, but I also wanna get the understanding of what people are dealing with, because life is tough and it's a challenge and it's never as easy as people say it is. But sometimes there's really really good experiences in life where we feel like things are going well, but there's always going to be those little hills on the side that we know that I should do this, but I just can't be bothered. But when we break that mentality, you start to open up this whole new realm of new opportunity and a new version of yourself, and that is the best version of yourself and that is how we further our lifestyles. Appreciate you being here today.

Speaker 1: 11:58

If you enjoyed this conversation, if you got some value from this, hit the like button. If you're here watching on the YouTube or leave a review. Rate the podcast if you're listening, leave a comment. Even more so. If this was valuable to you and you think someone else can really get something from this, share it.

Speaker 1: 12:14

This isn't about me. This is about how do we help other people grow, how do we further people's lifestyles. I'm just here to have a conversation, to share what's on my heart, what I think is relevant at this point in time, and I think it's important that other people hear that as well, because there's been so many conversations that I've had with other people and I'm like I wish I had heard that earlier, and when you heard it earlier, you would have started to make different changes or new changes or different decisions in your life. I'm speaking with conviction here, knowing that it's helped me, so I encourage you. If you think there's someone that could resonate with this or gain some insight or gain some value, share it with them. That would mean the absolute world to me as well.

Speaker 1: 12:57

Appreciate you being here, wherever you are, whatever you're doing, and you look after yourself. It's a new year and we're full steam ahead into 2024. And we just gotta remember to make sure that, yes, there's lots of things happening that you are looking after yourself and you are making decisions that are ongoing to enable yourself to grow. Appreciate you. You have a wonderful day. Cheers.