EP.124 - 10 powerful mindset equations! | Further Your Lifestyle Podcast

Chris Furlong: 0:00

Yo yo yo. Welcome back to the further your lifestyle podcast conversations on lifestyle passions and hustles. My name's Chris, I am your host and I'm super excited to be back here having the conversation with you. Episode 124 today and I stumbled across something while browsing the internet. So there is this website called Medium and essentially well, originally it was for people to just blog and tell stories and to share their own thoughts and things like that. So it's really just a blogging platform and I've been signed up to that for years, ever since I started doing my daily blogging, which was back between 2016 and 2018, which I spoke about last week and there was an article here or a piece or a blog that someone has written.

Chris Furlong: 0:42

That actually really stuck out to me and I thought it might be quite interesting to actually go through it in this episode and kind of, I haven't actually read it all. I started to and I was like this is really good, but I figured, how about? It's not a reaction, but actually go through and, you know, really get the gist of what it's saying, live and get a reaction to it. Right, and essentially, this article by Harsh Darje I could be saying his name wrong. I do apologize, mate, if you ever do listen to this, but it's called 10 powerful equations that will rewire your mindset Equations on ego, confidence, happiness, failure and outlier. So there's a whole bunch of things here which I think is super relevant to the stuff we've been talking about over the last couple of weeks and I wanted to go through it for myself. So I figured, well, let's go through it together and I'm going to put it up on screen as I go through it as well, so you can get the experience at the same time. But if you want to go to the article, I have put it down in the show notes as well and I'm just going to kind of react to it, think about it and share my thoughts. But I think it's going to be a bit of a different style of an episode, but I think it's going to be very, very relevant and actually really insightful for both of us.

Chris Furlong: 1:56

So let's get into it Now. As I've been saying over the last couple of weeks I do apologize if there's a choir of crickets the time of recording this they do come out loud and there's no shame. There's no shame. They go full shebang when it comes to making some noise.

Chris Furlong: 2:16

So the first one that he's put here is the first equation, number one the greater your knowledge, the smaller your ego, the greater your knowledge. It's so true, actually, because as we have more knowledge and understanding and experience, there's less of us to compete against. Now, what I mean by that is I mean, a good example would be from my business. At the moment there's a level of ego that I have because I think I've got it, figured it out, but I'm actually just trying to prove it to myself, like I'm trying to validate that what I'm doing is working. I'm being truthful, right. So until I've done enough reps I mean I've been doing it for two and a half years until I get to a point where it's so smooth that I'm not really thinking about it and someone else is running my business for me, I don't think I will have that. I don't think that ego will be gone until then, because I will have so much knowledge that I'm not having to try and compete against myself in proving that I'm actually doing a good job. I will know that I've done a good job and my ego, I think, will be eradicated. Then. I don't know, this could be a completely Me just saying I will, your, you'll have a different ego, but that may be the point, but I do.

Chris Furlong: 3:43

I do agree with this the greater your knowledge, the smaller your ego. As you know, we can be. Think about it. If someone asks you a question because you really understand it, you can answer in confidence. You can answer it humbly, humility, knowing, because you know about it. So you're not trying to prove anything, you're not trying to articulate in a way that makes it sound savvy. You're literally just telling people exactly what they need to know, and there's no fluff about it. And I think that's because we don't have any ego with it to say, oh yeah, well, I did this and I'm really good at it. So Therefore, I think this is the way that you should be doing it now. It's just kind of like I, this is what I did. So you know you just sharing, sharing with no other thought other than like I know how to do that, this is how you do it to. So I think I think this is very valid.

Chris Furlong: 4:30

Number two is self love builds belief, competence builds evidence. Together they feel unwavering confidence. So confidence equals Self love plus competence. Confidence equals self love and you build believe yet. So we will talk about self love just recently, and when we believe in ourselves and when we love ourselves, we're able to do so many more things because we don't have this obstacle of ourselves to get over. We don't have a mountain to climb necessarily. So when we love ourselves, that competency that it creates enables us to build, yeah, confidence, yeah, yeah, yeah. So. So because self love builds belief belief that we believe in our self, that gives us confidence Then we have the competence to go out and do something, to put in the reps, to show up and do the work. Therefore, we have evidence to show that we know what we're doing. Therefore, together, we're able to have a track record to show that we are very capable and we're confident in that capability. I like it. That's my thoughts on this and, of course, along the way, if you've got thoughts about any of this, chuck them down in the comments below if you're here watching on the YouTube, or send me a message of what you thought.

Chris Furlong: 5:47

Number three authenticity Is the ability to express and embrace your emotions without the fear of judgment, rejection, criticism or failure. So authenticity equals self expression plus vulnerability over fear. Yeah, okay. So when we are authentic, like when we, when we share, you know I've I know I keep referring to over the last few weeks, but over the last few weeks I have, I've shared some pretty open stuff. I've been pretty vulnerable with what I've been sharing and I think when we are vulnerable and authentically open about something, it means that, yes, we're expressing, embracing our emotions without worrying about what people are going to think.

Chris Furlong: 6:28

So, a lot of the time we I did the whole, I did the whole episode on this, you know, talking about how we project, what other people are thinking, thinking that they're thinking about us, but really we're just thinking that they're thinking about us, when they're not thinking about us at all. They don't have any care About us. You know, the question that I was, I left you all with was If you were to die today, the people that you compare yourself to, will they even? Will they even know? Does it even impact them? Probably not. So I think when we start to be authentic, it means that we can start to believe in ourselves enough to know that what it doesn't, really I don't care what other people are thinking, because it's my world, is my ecosystem, it's my problem. I'm just sharing and being open about it because it's like the whole scenario, like when you're in school, that you just get to put your hand up and ask a question, but there's probably other, you know another 10 kids in the classroom. They have the same question. So I think this makes sense, but I think it also means it takes a bit to get through.

Chris Furlong: 7:28

To get to this, I think we have to do number two, which is self love, and we need to build that belief and competence in ourselves. Number four, happiness 101, is Health plus wealth plus good relationships. Happiness equals health plus wealth plus good relationships. Health, I totally agree. Well, I don't think it's about money, because when it comes to wealth, I think it's about being able to just live without worry, right, and you don't have to have ridiculous amounts of money to be able to do that. I think it's really about the lifestyle and how you live. And having a wealthy lifestyle because you know, just because you have a really good car, doesn't actually mean you're wealthy, right. It just it just means you have a really good car.

Chris Furlong: 8:15

I think the way we maybe I'm diluting the what I'm trying to say here, but to me, that that's what my understanding of wealth is is being able to do something without you know, stress, worried out. You know, when it comes to making a financial decision, obviously good relationships. I think that's what creates happiness the most of all. This is because if we're healthy is more personal. It's inward right. You know, it's how our body functions and operates on a day to day basis. You're so if you're not healthy, it's very hard to be able to do, and then wealth enables us to be able to do additional things, like with leverage, or to go places or to see things. But good relationships, that's what brings the love and life together, because you know we want to be able to express our health or share our health. You know being able to do things with people, and if you've got money or you know the ability to go places but you're going alone, I think you you start to lose what it is you're chasing, but when you're doing it with someone else, that makes it more enjoyable. So I mean, this is just one example, but yeah, I agree with this.

Chris Furlong: 9:24

How would you rank happiness 101. What is that to you? What do you think it is? Number five discovering yourself is explore plus reflect over, don't expect so. Self discovery equals exploration plus reflection over expectations. Look, this is a good one. I was chatting to. Yeah, I think I think it was drew from look, mom, I'm hustling podcast.

Chris Furlong: 9:51

You know he doesn't like to set goals. He likes to set systems and processes. That way he gets To where he wants to be. This is similar. Similarly, this is of a similar nature because you know, expectations is usually what we expect when we have a goal like. So the goal is I want to do this. Therefore, the expectation is I'm gonna do that. But if you remove the goal and the expectations and we just say I want to explore on Seeing what it's going to take to make a hundred thousand dollars, and then you reflect as you go through that, right, you know, the first month, if you're gonna do it in 12 months, first month you can explore through what you've done, you reflect on it, you see what you've got and then you can start to think, okay, I need to change something so you can increase the ability to grow, and that is self discovery. This is actually really, really good.

Chris Furlong: 10:40

I think this is important one, but it's so hard for me personally. I'm speaking for me personally, but I think it is probably a society norm or generalization that to Just go self discover, like explore and reflect. I think that's quite hard, like I think, because for me, I like to have something rooted towards. This is what I'm going for, this is what I'm going for. But I guess if you change the mindset and say, well, yeah, I'm still going for it, but I'm exploring and reflecting the way they're not setting the goal as much, it's kind of like I'm removing the expectation, which is probably the pressure. Yeah, interesting, interesting. I like all these perspectives because and that's why I wanted to go through it with you guys because it's like having a conversation and you're able to get fresh off the cuff, as I'm Reading it and experiencing it and I'm not, you know, scripting anything. It's literally off the cuff and how I'm processing it and I think you know there's gonna be so many different ways people can, you know, take this and you know how it will be for their perspective or your perspective, but I think it's good.

Chris Furlong: 11:40

Number six is failure is simply a new opportunity with more experience. So failure equals feedback plus new opportunity. Yeah, I mean. Look, I think we only fail when we stop. If you have a setback, if you have a mistake, if you have something that pulls you down and you feel like it's a failure. Well, that's an opportunity To seek feedback, to then go do something more. Right and is a little process that I follow, and I've spoken about it before is rose lawn bud right, you know what went well, what didn't go well. So what's the new opportunity now? Right, what could have gone well? I was like, yeah, I had the right intention. What didn't go well is like how I executed. Therefore, I need to continue with the intention, but I need to execute in a different way, or do it better. Right, and that's that's how we continue to grow. Thanks, complete sense.

Chris Furlong: 12:33

Number seven is become an outlier by obsessing over your craft and putting in the work. Outlier equals obsession plus 10,000 reps. Now, I recently finished the book outlier or outliers and it was a really good book, right, and in there it talks about a whole different things and we're not going to go into that Today. But as an outlier, we can create ourselves as an outlier by loving the process, obsessing about the process, being hooked by the process, being passionate about the process or whatever it is that we want to do, and then putting in the reps with that passion. Is, you know, like, if you want to be a drummer, I'm a drummer, haven't jumped for a very long time, so maybe I'm not a drummer. But you know, for me to get to where I was able to use to play at my church, it came a level of I had to put a certain amount of reps in in place to be out and have to have a level of passion to get me to that confidence level or the ability to be able to do that Without worry and then to be able to play and play with a band and follow the lead guitars, follow the you know, the song leader and be able to pick up what's going on. And that only came through doing more reps. Plus, I was passionate about it. If you're not passionate about it, then it's got. You're not necessarily going to be in the right groove to be able to do it. When I don't mean groove is in like rudiment, I mean like groove is in like the right attitude. But if you've done 10,000 reps, you know I think you will actually be able to get in there, get the job done. But by putting them together it's what maximizes you or sets you apart from others, because it takes you to a whole new tier, a whole new level. This makes complete sense, I love it. I love it.

Chris Furlong: 14:20

Number Eight is beat stress, reduce overthinking and increase self care. This is like talking to me, stress equals overthinking is greater than self care. Yeah, so to beat it is, we need to reduce overthinking and increase self care. Now, the reason why I laugh about this is because I have been stressing this week over some things. Just um, sorry, I wouldn't be saying I'm stressing, I'm a big thinker, I'm an overthinker, which probably does create stress, whether I know it's stress or not, but it does create thoughts in my head that makes me challenge and pick at things and look at data and think, oh, what's going on? You know this is more some of my business, but I was feeling a little frustrated just literally before doing this podcast, and I wanted to go do this podcast, but I was just right. So I went and played some video games. I played for 30 minutes, calm me down, got me into a you know a state where I was just like I'm all good, right, and you know, I was able to reduce the stress because I did a bit of self care, like I gave myself a break. So I this, this, this is like this is like perfect for me what I need to hear right now. So I think I think we all do this. You know we, we tend to, you know we do it our own ways self sabotage, whether we know it or not. I think I think we do it. So have a think about it yourself. Do you do this and how do you do it? So how can you increase self-care over the overthinking?

Chris Furlong: 15:47

Number nine is procrastination. Is planning without action? Procrastination equals planning the work plus patience. It's an interesting way of putting it, because then this is this is good. Coming back to goals, like I know a lot of people that set goals or say they want to do things but they don't do anything that gets them close to the goal.

Chris Furlong: 16:07

I used to work with someone and this is going back years, years ago and you know, I said where do you see yourself in five years? Actually, it was when I was hiring them I think this is back when I was working the nine to five and they said, oh, you know, I want to own my own business, I want to be a business owner. I said, okay, okay, and I said great, so what are you doing for that? It's like, oh, I have no idea, and like I understand it because it is. It is, it is a track down the road, but five years is not a long time, right?

Chris Furlong: 16:36

And if you want to be a business owner, like, there's things that you can be doing today that enables you to get to the position to be a business owner, and it might even just be study, it might be running a side hustle, it might be having a side business, it might be. And when we say business, let's talk about you know, we're doing a six-figure business here. Let's let's just put that as that's. What is a definition of a, of a being a business owner? But I mean, obviously there's so many definitions of it. But if you have a side hustle, yeah, you're a business owner, right, because you have a side hustle.

Chris Furlong: 17:07

But what I'm trying to say is like it's the same thing for, like me saying, oh yeah, I'm gonna, I'm gonna run a math on this year or something, or I want to run a half marathon, or I want to run a 50k and it's okay, cool. So what's your training place? Like I haven't signed up yet or I don't know what I'm doing it, or it's like, oh, you know, I don't, I'm probably just gonna run and see what happens. Right, you know that's procrastination when we set a goal and then we put a plan in place systems, processes that enables us to get to where we want to be. But if you'll have all these plans, all these ambitions, but you're not doing anything and you're just sitting around expecting something to happen, it's not going to happen and that is procrastinating.

Chris Furlong: 17:46

Very good points number 10 impatience with actions. Patience with results. Huh, in, patients with actions, patients with results. So results equals doing the work plus patients. Yeah, okay, so this is kind of like the inverse of what we just said. So, basically, you know you do the work, you know what you've got to do. So you're doing the work, but it's going to take time to do it, right, meaning, yeah, you plan a treat today, you got to do the work in managing it, watering it, fertilizing it, depending what it is, and then you've got to wait 20 years before it's going to be the big oak that it will be. That makes complete sense. But the consistency of doing the work with the patients and, you know, holding the line is what is super key here. Yeah, this is good.

Chris Furlong: 18:40

I love these little short styles, right, and you've seen it on screen yourself. So let me know what you think. But I mean this guy, as he says his mission is to simplify life goals, actions, relationships and thoughts. Simplifying it right, and I think you know this is the kind of stuff that I like and I would love to do more of. This kind of thing is bringing you little quick tips and tricks, in a sense that's really deep but really short and sharp, because we can have the conversation, and I think a lot of the time is, we can read a lot, we can hear a lot, we can say a lot, we can, you know, watch a lot, but there's just so much information overload, and if we can condense it and bring it down to the core components of what it is we're trying to say in this case, you know he has. I think it just helps us understand and it means we can just cut the fluff and get straight to the point and actually have the conversation about what it is we're talking about.

Chris Furlong: 19:28

You know, whether it's confidence, self, love, competence, authenticity, what is happiness, you know, self. There's some really good meat here, right? So I mean, look, this is this is kind of short and sweet episode, but these are the things that I think, are so relevant to our day to day. For me, especially furthering your lifestyle. My mission is to further my lifestyle, but also to help you further your lifestyle, and all these things are super, super duper relevant to making that happen, right. So I would encourage you go back I'll leave the link in the show notes Go through this yourself, challenge yourself.

Chris Furlong: 20:00

What are you doing that you can be doing differently or better? Right, because you know, maybe you're not giving yourself enough self love, maybe you are overthinking things, maybe you're procrastinating, maybe you're curious of why you're not getting the results, and maybe it's because you're not doing any of the work. I don't know. I just give some really good perspective. Simply just in a box, right, and when we think outside of the box, that's when our lives can change. It's like getting any comfort zone as well. All right, really do appreciate you being here. If you do have questions, comments about all this, let's continue the conversation. Reach out, get in contact. I do have SpeakPipe, which is wwwspeakpipecom. Slash further your lifestyle. You can drop a message, a voicemail of sorts, and I can integrate it into this podcast.

Chris Furlong: 20:44

Again, go have a look at this article. I don't know if you need to pay to say it. Hopefully not. Actually, I'd hopefully haven't done anything that's a bit inappropriate here in Stoller and anything, so the graphics that I've probably shown aren't probably exactly the same, just to make sure that I'm not copyrighting anything. But go check it out for yourself. Go through this. I think it's really really good Right, and I think we can all learn something from this. Shout out to the guy that started Really good job, mate. I'll put the link in the description below Again. Any comments? Chuck them down below. Otherwise you have a wonderful day, cheers.