Further Your Lifestyle

Ep.57 - Learn from my Lessons from Chasing my Dreams | Further Your Lifestyle Podcast

April 10, 2022 Your Host: Chris Furlong Episode 57
Further Your Lifestyle
Ep.57 - Learn from my Lessons from Chasing my Dreams | Further Your Lifestyle Podcast
Show Notes Transcript

One thing I am doing on a more regular basis is reflecting on LESSONS from the past year and since taking a CHANCE on me, I have 5 LESSONS again today I want to share with you regardless of where you are on your own journey to further your life.

Watch in YT: https://youtu.be/7VzXVbsYgao

▬▬▬▬ CHAPTERS ▬▬▬▬

0:00 - Episode 57 - Lessons from taking a chance on me
1:00 - We don’t Know what we Don’t Know (L1)
4:32 - Perspective will change the conversation (L2)
5:18 - Gratitude has been a HUGE player
5:59 - we cannot compare to others…
7:00 - Growing slow is very IMPORTANT (L3)
7:44 - it won’t always be UP UP UP
8:28 - the moment now, is what we reflect on later
8:55 - the journey is the NORTH STAR (L4)
10:33 - check in on your HAPPINESS (L5)
11:50 - the ROSE THORN BUD exercise
12:25 - bonus lessons… the Reality of Imposter Syndrome
13:29 - how to deal with it?
13:56 - the wrap up


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[00:00:00] Chris Furlong: Yo, yo yo, welcome back to the further, your lifestyle podcast, conversations on lifestyle passions and hustles. My name's Chris Furlong. I'm your host. And I'm super excited to be back here having the conversation with you episode 57 today. And I want to chat to you about whole bunch of different lessons and in particular lessons that I've taken from actually taking a chance on me.

[00:00:21] Chris Furlong: Um, if, if you're new here, if you have no idea what I'm talking about, uh, about a year and three months ago, I decided to take a chance on. Step away from the nine to five gig. And, uh, actually just pursue my passions, dreams and goals, which was this podcast and a whole bunch of other things as well over that year in three months, you know, I'm still learning.

[00:00:38] Chris Furlong: There's still lots of things, which I'm learning every day actually. Um, but I have about five areas, which I think, um, are all going to be relevant to us all, whether you're trying to do something of simulate, you know, whether you're wanting to get out of the nine to five and go pursue a passion and work for yourself or.

[00:00:55] Chris Furlong: You know, follow a dream or follow a goal, or maybe you're just thinking about it. Or maybe it's just something in life that this will resonate with. I think these will resonate with you regardless of wherever you are or whatever you're doing. Let's dive in. Now, the first lesson that I've taken from the over the last year or so is, I don't know what I don't know.

[00:01:15] Chris Furlong: And it's actually more so we don't know what we don't know, but a lot of the time when it comes to thinking about things or wanting things, um, or whether it's opportunities can be quite hesitant, um, we've become quite defensive. We, we tend to. Put all this conjecture, or we get stuck in our head and we end up missing out on these opportunities as well.

[00:01:35] Chris Furlong: We're scared or we're unfamiliar, or we're unsure of what lies on the other side. You know, sometimes we'd look and see that the grass might be greener on the other side, but sometimes it's too scary to jump over there. And sometimes it's not actually as, as, uh, you know, green, as we always thought it was.

[00:01:50] Chris Furlong: But for me, I knew I wanted something different and I've always had this dream and goal to work for myself and do something, um, in the area of this podcast. But I had this idea of what that could possibly look like, but it was blurry. It was fluffy and it was an idea. Um, and having an idea is obviously a start, but I had this idea that, yeah.

[00:02:13] Chris Furlong: Things would just happen over a long period of time that things would just fall into place, that things would just work out. Um, which is probably a false mentality. A lot of us do have these ideas or dreams and goals that things will just happen, but if you're not working towards it, how, how can they happen?

[00:02:29] Chris Furlong: Um, but then I was also challenged that if I don't do any. How can anything change? Like if I'm not putting in the action, how can there be steps towards that actually happening? And if I don't jump out there and test the waters and go a little deeper or, you know, see what could happen or see what's out there, then I'm not going to know what I don't know.

[00:02:49] Chris Furlong: Right. So therefore in order for me, I had to, I had to make that decision. I had to make it work. I had to get out there. I had to taste and see what there is out there. Um, and I had to give it a go. So. I think this is relevant for so many different areas. It's not about me saying that, you know, if you've got this itch about, you know, trying out this new gig or, you know, a new side business or a hustle or passion, you know, stop everything and just drop it and go do it.

[00:03:14] Chris Furlong: What I'm saying is, you know, try and find some ways to actually discover it, you know, and to scratch that itch in a smaller amount before jumping fully in it's, it's a big, long process, of course. And I've spoken about this before, but I think this is also very, very relevant. When we go to try new things, whether it is maybe you're starting to, to run, or maybe you're wanting to pick up a new sport, or maybe, maybe you, aren't going to want to start a little side hustle or a little side business, and you want to try something on the side.

[00:03:42] Chris Furlong: This is perfect for it. You know, if you do go test it, go see it, dedicate some time to it. And also around new opportunities and new doors opening, the same thing. There will be people or things that come your way that will offer you new opportunity and you need to be willing to. I understand that, you know, look at it with an open mind and be willing to think.

[00:04:01] Chris Furlong: Does this actually get me to where I want him to go there, having gone through the process of trying these new things and experiencing these new things and actually doing it after a year and a bit, you know, this podcast, my reselling business, and a few other little things on the side too. Now I know that there is so much opportunity out there.

[00:04:18] Chris Furlong: Now I know that there's so many things possible. Um, when you put your, you know, put your hands into action and when you actually go out there with, in Tet, But I had to be willing to try and I had to be willing to learn along the way. And that's what makes all the difference. Number two is perspective will change the conversation and over the last year or so, you know, perspective has been a huge, a huge eye opener for me.

[00:04:43] Chris Furlong: And you know, whether it's from doing some regular reviews, whether it's monthly or quarterly, weekly, or annually, but. I think the big perspective, um, insight for me has been being able to start from zero, start from scratch and build this podcast, build my business and follow along with that progress.

[00:05:04] Chris Furlong: Being able to see that over time, it keeps me humble. It keeps me honest, right. Because I've actually had to see, well, what have I done? What have I been able to achieve? How far have I come? Am I up? Am I down? You know, how is that progress going? But I think the big kicker has been granted. That has come with it.

[00:05:21] Chris Furlong: You know, we, we tend to always be behind someone else's progress game, you know, where we're always thinking, oh, I want to be like this. Or, you know, we tend to compare, but at the same time, we're always ahead of someone else too. You know, people wish, oh, I wish I was doing what you're doing or so glad you could do that.

[00:05:36] Chris Furlong: I wouldn't be able to do it. Or, um, how did you get to there so quickly? You know, people always asking those questions and you think, oh, well, it's just, you know, you, you start to take it for granted or you might realize, oh, well, It's gone out and done it. And I think that gratitude piece really plays a huge part in helping us understand and fathom well, just how, how far we have come in that perspective around it.

[00:05:57] Chris Furlong: I think, you know, one thing we should always consider is we cannot compare to others as the, their story, their journey, and their advantages are always going to be different compared to yours. The only fair compare is yourself. You, you are the best compare that you can do, whether it's from a week ago, a month ago, a year ago, You know, the only fair compares that you can do because that's, you, you're, you're actually using the same baseline.

[00:06:22] Chris Furlong: Right. And I've got a whole episode on this as well. And I think the other thing is, you know, you need to be grateful for where you are at, in the moment, you know, things happen out of our control, things happen. Um, yeah. As I said, out of our control and that's that's okay, what can you control? What can you do?

[00:06:39] Chris Furlong: What can you be thankful for? What are you still able to do? And remember. It's all about, you know, looking at at 1% over time, um, whether it's daily, weekly on a progressive manner, uh, the book atomic habits talks about, you know, doing that 1% better every day, over a longer period of time should the shore wins over a long period of time is going to get you that big compounding effect, which actually kind of leads me into the, into the next point, which is point number three, which is growing slow in a very similar fashion.

[00:07:08] Chris Furlong: Um, growing slow is, is very, very important here. You know, I've become very, very comfortable with the whole rollercoaster metaphor in the game of growth. And what I mean by that is there's lots of ups. There's lots of downs. There's going to be swings and roundabouts and some days are going to feel really, really easy.

[00:07:24] Chris Furlong: And then some days are going to be really, really hard or weeks or months and whatever, but you're going to zoom out and you have to zoom out to be able to reflect on this progress and. Okay. What is the trend here? Where are you progressing? What is the average over time? Which direction are you going?

[00:07:40] Chris Furlong: Are you trending up? Which most of the time you'll be surprised you likely are. And you know, sometimes this happiness can be tied to that and you know, when we're going on and you see that. It's like a win-win, but sometimes it's not always going to be that case. Sometimes you are going to be in those down periods in those down seasons and that's okay.

[00:07:58] Chris Furlong: But it's about looking at this and seeing how we can pivot how we can adjust. And I know because you know, going into, I think it was six months into the, into the taking the time off, I realized we went into lockdown and things that had planned, they were out of my control. I wasn't able to do certain things that I had intended.

[00:08:17] Chris Furlong: So I had to adapt. I had to pivot and yeah, it was a down period, but I got out of it. I got through it, we pushed through together. Um, and I think having that perspective now helps me realize that. What ha what is happening in the moment is something that you're going to look at later and realize that it was all part of that growing slow journey.

[00:08:35] Chris Furlong: And you need to go through that experience to be able to get that experience, to then be able to have the hindsight later, to see how far you've come. It's quite, it's kind of like back to the future kind of thing. It's, you know, future present past and all that. But one thing to really consider is you do you write and you know, whether you are growing faster than someone else growing slower, you are growing at the pace you need to be growing at, which then comes to point number four, which is the journey or a journey, the journey isn't about to be.

[00:09:03] Chris Furlong: All tomorrow necessarily. It's about your north star. And if you don't know what I'm referring to, I have done an episode on this too, but essentially your north star or the north star is the vision or the ambition or the end game you have in mind of where you're going, where you want to be. You need to be thinking about, and you need to be knowing what that is so that all that you're doing is aligning towards these areas of your north star.

[00:09:26] Chris Furlong: Now, these, there could be multiple things that could be pillars. They could be, you know, an end goal in mind, but it's a great way to help you stay rooted and, and stay on the path in the right direction. Um, and it's a way to check back to make sure that you are on that right. Direct. And that you're aligning to what you want and where you want to be in the long-term, but also in the short term too.

[00:09:47] Chris Furlong: And it helps you ensure that you don't lose sight of where you want to be. But the key thing is don't lose sight of what your north star is and where your end game is. Right. And that that's been key because going through those rollercoasters, going through that journey, growing slow, having that perspective, it all helps with this.

[00:10:05] Chris Furlong: Knowing, no, this is where I'm going. This is what I'm doing. You've got to put in the extra work or you got to work towards, it's kind of like it's the same mentality is we go into jobs and we want to get promoted, or we want to be at a certain level. We're willing to do certain things to get to that.

[00:10:18] Chris Furlong: That's kind of like a north star. It's the same mentality when you're doing your own thing. I would encourage you that if you've got this north star or a vision, put it up on your wall, put it somewhere where you can visualize it or see it visibly. You know, it's, it helps keep you alive. It helps keep you centered and helps.

[00:10:33] Chris Furlong: Keep you honest. Number five is actually pulse check the happiness meter. Now I talked about pulse checking last week. Um, but this final lesson I've been more and more welcoming to on a regular basis and yeah, that's having a happiness check and these are great to do on a regular basis. I would say on a, on a weekly basis, to be honest, Asking yourself, different questions to see how you're going to check in and see if things are aligned.

[00:10:59] Chris Furlong: Things are going in the right direction and might be questions around asking yourself what made you smile this week or. Is there anything you wish you could have changed this week is, um, there are anything that's being a bit of a challenge. Is there something that you can control versus not? So for instance, if there was anything you could change, but you realize that something is out of your control, then you know, it's something that you can push aside.

[00:11:25] Chris Furlong: You have to focus on the things that you can control. Um, are you feeling happy? If no. Then why like dive into understanding? Why are you feeling down? What's driving the negativity, actually asking those. And sometimes it can be easy to have these conversations with someone else. The other question would be, are you stressed?

[00:11:43] Chris Furlong: Why are you stressed? And what is making you frustrated? These, these are really basic questions, but you know, another thing that you can do is rose thorn, embark, and rose indicates, you know, what's something that's working, something that's positive phone is what's being a challenge. What's coming across as negative and buddy's, what's blossoming.

[00:12:01] Chris Furlong: What's an opportunity. What's something that is going to help you proceed. And the idea is that you want to know. If you're feeling happy, even though there's a lot of things that, you know, challenging you, keeping you honest or working hard, then that's, that's the win. It's all about being happier because if you're happy you're doing the right thing and you know, doing this pulse check can obviously lead to quite deeper insight or quite a deeper conversation than you expect, but it's a necessary one.

[00:12:26] Chris Furlong: No, I actually have one more lesson. And, um, so that makes it six, but it's kind of a bonus thing. And it's kind of just popped up in the back of my mind, which is. Imposter syndrome, and this is real and it's, it's, it's the real deal, right? It's it's something usually. I have started there. I realized that it's been something usually as I start to step outside of my comfort zone, as I, you know, start to jump into something new, new territory, trying something different, this is when it pops up.

[00:12:51] Chris Furlong: And that doubt the feeling like I don't have what it takes or you're not good enough. Or maybe, you know, you're a fraud or something like that. If you're feeling this, there is, there is a winter, this it's and you know, you have to look at this on that perspective, but yeah. If you are failing this, it's usually because you are stepping up, you are growing, you're going to that next level.

[00:13:13] Chris Furlong: You're stepping out of your comfort zone. This is a good thing, but dealing with it is more important. You know, you need to make sure that you're pushing through it. And that's a whole nother ball game, you know, being able to have that real conversation and being honest about it and accept being able to push through it as well.

[00:13:29] Chris Furlong: So how have I been dealing with these conversations while chatting with someone or, um, getting help to work through it? I think the key thing is being accepting it and understanding that it's real to then be able to move forward. But as I said, I think finding someone to chat about with it is, is going to be the key and it helps.

[00:13:46] Chris Furlong: And if you need help to chat about it, then. More than happy to have that conversation. So reach out. So that's it. That's five lessons. No, no. It's six lessons. And you know, that I've learned from taking a chance on me. And I think from all this, right, there's, there's something there that is relevant to who you are, whoever you are, whatever you doing.

[00:14:03] Chris Furlong: And I hope there is something that you can take away. And if maybe you want to talk about that more, do let me know. What I want to say quickly is, you know, there's no regrets from doing this. You know, it's the best thing that I've done. And I would encourage any of you in all of you to look at these lessons and see how they can apply to you, whether it's your current situation, your life and goals, maybe there's someone else that you think this could resonate with.

[00:14:25] Chris Furlong: Um, As I always say, I'm happy to continue the conversation. You can reach out, hit us up on Instagram at furtheryourlifestyle or on Twitter at, furtheryourlife or drop an email to hello@furtheryourlifestyle.com more than happy to continue the conversation. Hey, you can even drop a comment if you are watching, listening this on the YouTube experience as well.

[00:14:45] Chris Furlong: Um, because I think that's the key thing is one thing is. Listening to it, but then taking action and continue to drive that conversation is going to be that next level thing that's going to enable you to grow and get to where you want to go. Really do appreciate you and you have a wonderful day. Cheers.

[00:15:01] Chris Furlong: Now, if you didn't know, we do have the podcast merge and this is with a key focus. And enamel pins. Now, if you haven't checked these out, make sure you do because the intent of these are really just to be a small token and a reminder for you to charge on, to push on and to further your lifestyle, whether it is a gift for someone else to encourage them, or maybe to inspire them, or maybe it's a way to motivate yourself, or you can simply just make a purchase to simply support the podcast, which would be greatly appreciated.

[00:15:29] Chris Furlong: We do also have some sweaters and some long tastes, so make sure you check it out. Lincoln, the description and in the show. Really to appreciate it. Cheers.